


Bringin' Me Home To You

by Bizarra



Series: The Playlist Series [2]
Category: Star Trek: Voyager
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, F/F, Post-Endgame
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-05-26
Updated: 2018-05-26
Packaged: 2019-05-14 01:09:54
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,816
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14759726
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Bizarra/pseuds/Bizarra
Summary: Kathryn's life takes a dramatic turn at Voyager's Decommissioning Ceremony.





	Bringin' Me Home To You

**Author's Note:**

> Listening to my JC playlist and this series happened. Takes up where Sentimental Journey leaves off.
> 
> Star Trek Voyager and it's characters are owned by CBS/Paramount. I'm just playing.  
> 'Annie's Other Song' was written by John Denver.

_I’m bringin’ me home to you_  
_It’s all that I have to give_  
_My life, my love, my everything_  
_It’s you I choose to be with_

### Chapter 1

Kathryn stepped off the train, into the bright San Francisco sun, a new woman. The train ride had done more good for her than months of therapy. She smiled and thought to herself that the message from Chakotay had had a lot to do with it, as well. 

The words were out there now and, perhaps writing them, instead of speaking them, had been the way to go. They were permanent, that way. No going back. Now, they could speak about it, openly and honestly. Kathryn took a deep breath, hoisted her bag onto her shoulder, and walked forward into her future.

“Admiral!” Kathryn heard and looked around for the familiar voice. She quickly found B’Elanna waving to her, with little Miral on her hip. Kathryn waved back and walked towards her former Chief Engineer, and now one of her closest friends.

“B’Elanna! How are you?” she asked as she gave the woman a half-hug.

“An’Kaff’rin!” The two-year-old leaned forward to give her a hug.

“And you, little one,” she pressed a kiss on the small forehead, “how have you grown so much in four months?” Kathryn reached out and took the child as she leaned forward, arms outstretched. She set the child on her hip as they started walking. “Is that husband of yours staying out of trouble?”

B’Elanna chuckled. “Oh, you know Tom.”

Kathryn laughed. “So, no.”

The younger woman laughed as they walked. “You seem a lot happier than you were when you left, Admiral.” 

“Kathryn, please. I’m not your commanding officer anymore.”

B’Elanna smiled. “Sorry. Old habits.” She waved away a stray hair. “You didn’t answer my question.”

“That was a question?” Kathryn said with humor, untangling her hair from the grip on the little one she still held. She took a breath and looked forward as they walked down Third Avenue, en route to the nearest public transport. “I really needed the train ride. It gave me the time to stop and think. And remember.” She switched Miral to her other hip, then handed her back to her mother, when B’Elanna offered.

Kathryn re-shifted her bag, now that her arm was free. “I remembered a lot of things. Good things,” she turned and tapped the two year old on her nose. “And bad things. I laughed, I cried. I told Chakotay I loved him.” She stopped abruptly. She hadn’t meant to say that. 

“Wait, what?” The half-Klingon woman turned, making sure she’d heard right. 

Now she was in it and, to be honest, it felt good to finally get it off her chest. “I got a message from Chakotay, yesterday afternoon. He’d been out of communications range, just got back into range and heard about Voyager,” Kathryn explained. “He admitted that he loved me and I replied that I loved him, too.”

“Yes!” B’Elanna exclaimed. “Tom owes me six years of replicator rations.”

Kathryn laughed as they started walking again. “Tom and his betting pools.” Then, she realized: “Wait, he bet against me?” His wife nodded with a smirk. “Well, it’s back to Ensign for him,” Kathryn laughed along with her friend. 

They reached their destination and stepped onto the bus that would take them to Tom and B’Elanna’s neighborhood. During their travel, Kathryn watched Miral pick on some snacks and smiled. It was damned good to be back with her Voyager family. She smiled and said “Mmm, thank you,” when the toddler fed her a Cheerio.

### Chapter 2

The next morning, Kathryn stood in the guest bedroom of Tom and B’Elanna’s house, putting the finishing touches on her dress uniform. All this white. She looked like she was going to a wedding, not a funeral. Kathryn sighed and chided herself. She had to stop thinking of this as a funeral. It was to be a celebration of Voyager. She looked at herself in the mirror and made a face. 

Kathryn walked back to the bed and sat, elbows on her legs, and rubbed her face with her hands. “Get it together, Kathryn. You’ve got to be the strong one, today.” She took a deep breath, willed her strength to come to the fore, and stood. To Hell with it. She took off the white jacket and replaced it with her grey and black Admiral’s coat. They could be pissed if they wanted to be, but she’d be damned if she was wearing white to this occasion.

Within the hour, Kathryn and the Paris family were on the short-range shuttle en route to Mars. Kathryn occupied her time by watching the stars go by. With a start, she realized this was the first time she’d been back in space since Voyager arrived back at Earth. She was starting to get nervous. Kathryn had no idea how many of Voyager’s crew would be there. And the closer they got to Mars, the closer she got to the man she should have been honest with a long time ago.

She hadn’t heard from him in two days, which Kathryn owned up to finding a ship and travel time. Her stomach was in knots thinking about it. Would he truly be there in time? Being out of communications range meant he was quite a distance away. More than two days travel? She hoped not. This ceremony was going to be hard enough and Kathryn wasn’t sure she could do it without her best friend standing next to her.

Her reverie was broken when Miral toddled over and lay something in her lap. Kathryn smiled when she realized it was a miniature toy Voyager. “What’s that?” Kathryn asked the toddler.

“Vo’ger!” she supplied happily. “Papa’s Vo’ger!” 

Kathryn laughed as she looked at Tom who demurred and sputtered. “I don’t know where she got that from.”

“I sure do,” Kathryn teased, then pulled the little one onto her lap, to point out where things were on the ship.

The next thing she knew, they were docking at the Utopia Planitia shuttle launch. Kathryn handed Miral back to her parents, along with the toy, and stood to make she she had everything before disembarking. 

Kathryn stood at the door of the shuttle, briefly watching the activity. “Okay, Admiral, here goes.” She stepped out and walked the short way to the dry dock bay, where the decommissioning ceremony was being held. As she arrived, Kathryn began to recognize so many faces. They were all there. 

There was the Doctor, chatting with Seven; Mike Ayala and Kenneth Dalby clearly swapping stories; Megan Delaney, which meant Jenny wasn’t too far behind; Harry Kim. Even Tuvok had come in from Vulcan. They were all there. She pressed her hand to her heart. Just seeing them all meant so much to her. Kathryn walked to the railing and looked up into the shielded, unpressurized area, where Voyager was in dry dock. “Hello, old friend.” 

Damn, she looked rough, Kathryn thought. The Delta Quadrant had put them all through the wringer. Voyager was no exception. It didn’t look like they’d even tried to repair her. It wasn’t fair. In Starship terms, Voyager was still fairly young. She’d seen some ships, still in the line of duty, that were well over twenty years. Voyager’s decommissioning was unnecessarily political, despite the fact that she managed to get the majority of her crew across uncharted territories, full of danger. She’d become known as a notorious ship. The Titanic, if you will, of Starfleet. She should be decorated, not …

“Kathryn.”

She dropped her head at the sound of her name. How did the way he said her name always sound like a caress? Kathryn turned her head slowly to face him, almost as if she were afraid he wasn’t really there. Chakotay was wearing a somber, dark, business suit. His hair was a little longer, greying in places, and covered his tattoo in a very non-regulation way. He looked happy. He looked relaxed. And he looked like home.

“Chakotay,” she turned to him, afraid to move. Kathryn was afraid if she did move, her legs would collapse out from under her, and her fragile emotions would spill out, everywhere.

Wordlessly, he closed the distance between them and pulled her into his arms. He felt Kathryn’s arms wrap around him and hold tight as she cried. Softly, at first, then hard, heaving sobs. Chakotay cradled her and softly kissed the top of her head as she buried herself as deeply as she could into his shoulder. He held her there, until her cries finally stopped.

Kathryn had no idea what came over her. The minute she was in his arms, the dam burst and she purged herself of two, no, nine years of emotions. Kathryn had no idea how long she cried, but once she stopped, she pulled herself together and looked up at him. “How do you always know exactly when I need you the most?”

“A good First Officer should know his Captain as well as he knows himself.” He gently brushed away her tears with his thumbs. Chakotay leaned and gently kissed her, tasting the saltiness of her tears. He lifted and looked at her with a smile that danced in his eyes, “I’m sorry. I forgot about Starfleet protocol.”

She gave a half-sob, half-laugh. ”You aren’t my first officer, anymore.” She pulled him closer and kissed him, deeply; hungrily; only stopping when she heard a few whoops and catcalls. “Well, hell. There’s no hiding this, anymore.”

Chakotay laughed and pulled her closely into a bear hug, then moved so they could walk together to the dais, where Admiral Paris was waiting for them with a chiding look on his face. “Sorry,” Chakotay said, “did we miss anything?”

That got a few laughs from the crowd and a yell from Tom Paris: “Only about nine years.” 

Kathryn laughed as she wiped away the last of her tears and pointed at the younger Paris. “Stop it. Oh, ye who bet against us.” She watched as Tom opened and closed his mouth, then turned to his wife, who had crossed her arms and looked rather smug with herself. “Behave. We are in civilized company, now,” Kathryn reminded gesturing with her head toward the Admirals in presence.

“Who?” Tom turned in his seat and gestured, “this crew?” As the laughter rumbled around the room, he continued: “You know, the odds were eighty-twenty, in your favor.” 

Kathryn smirked and pointed around the room. “That twenty percent of you are all demoted.” The laughter roared and Kathryn looked at Chakotay and smiled, then looked down as she joined in the laughter. This was their family, and she’d been part of it all along.

“Okay, okay,” Admiral Paris tapped on his microphone to get everyone’s attention. He looked at Kathryn. “How did you keep these people in line?” 

“My Irish stubbornness.”

Chakotay spoke up: “And a good glare.” That got a few more laughs.

Admiral Owen Paris smiled and did his best to get the proceedings back on track. “As you know, this is a bittersweet day. Voyager was a good ship to her Captain,” he nodded at Kathryn, “and her crew,” he gestured to the audience. “And, today, we are here to honor her service record.”

Kathryn squeezed Chakotay’s hand, that she hadn’t let go of since they’d taken their place next to Admiral Paris. She looked up at the ship, floating in the dry dock clamps, beyond the shields in front of them. The memories came quickly: The Badlands, the Kazon, the Hirogen, Kes, Neelix, the Borg. Kathryn came to her senses when she realized Chakotay was tugging on her hand.

Admiral Paris moved to stand between she and Chakotay. Only then did she drop her First Officer’s hand. Paris spoke: “I am proud to present to you, Admiral Janeway, as the only commanding officer of the USS Voyager, her dedication plaque,” he pointed out to both she and Chakotay, “with the updated listing of her Senior Staff.” 

Wild applause broke out as Kathryn smiled and hugged the plaque to her. “Thank you,” she said as she stepped closer to the microphone. Chakotay took the plaque from her so she could have room to speak. 

“Thank you,” she said again, as the applause died down so they could hear her speak. “It was an honor and a privilege to serve aboard Voyager, as her commanding officer. She was a damned good ship; a little cranky at times; much like her Captain. She fought her many battles bravely and provided a good home for all of us. As her crew, each and every one of you deserves a round of applause for surviving, not only everything the Delta Quadrant threw at you, but, for having me as your captain.” She clapped as another round of laughter broke out. “Especially to Commander Chakotay. Because, for seven years, I was a royal pain in the ass.” Chakotay nodded broadly as she chuckled. “You didn’t have to agree so fast.” 

He wrapped an arm around her waist and looked at her as he said: “That’s okay, I’ll make up for it, later.” Kathryn laughed heartily as she turned and hugged him. She hadn’t felt this happy in years, maybe not ever. She returned the kiss he offered, amid hoots from the crew. 

Kathryn pulled away and turned back to the mic. “I’m not finished,” she elbowed Chakotay, “stop sidetracking me.” She took a breath and continued on a more somber note. “It would be remiss of me, of all of us, to not remember each of those who didn’t make it back home.” She then spoke every name, from memory, because each death was a notch on her heart. 

She handed each person on the Dais a glass of champagne, then lifted her glass. “Let us drink a toast to each and every one of our lost family members.” Kathryn looked upward. “And to Voyager. Thank you, beautiful lady, for keeping us safe.” 

She tapped her glass to Chakotay’s and drank to the cheers of “here, here!”

Once the ceremony had ended, Kathryn and Chakotay mingled together among the crew. She made sure to say hello to each and every one of them. Once rounds were made, they ended up back at the table with Tom and B’Elanna.

### Chapter 3

A few minutes later, Admiral Paris stepped up behind them and tapped Kathryn on the shoulder. He leaned between she and Chakotay and said he’d like to talk to them privately. They made their excuses to Tom and B’Elanna, and followed the elder Paris down a walkway and up some stairs, to one of the design offices adjacent to the side of the large, shielded and unpressurized corner of the hangar, where Voyager floated in dry dock. 

As they stepped inside the office, Admiral Paris closed the door. He regarded them, crossed his arms and leaned against the desk. “I just wanted to tell you we’ve had an update.” He crooked his head toward the window that led to the outside hangar. “Voyager’s had a reprieve.”

“A what?” Kathryn slowly sat in the nearest chair. “Does this mean she’s not going to be destroyed.” She felt Chakotay’s hand gently on her shoulder and reached to cover it with hers.

Paris sat in the desk chair opposite Kathryn and nodded his head. “She’s been sold to a private buyer.”

That shocked Kathryn. She hadn’t known such a thing was possible. Well, that’s not entirely true. She knew decommissioned ships could be sold to companies and other worlds, to help with their protection. But, an individual buyer? That would be cost prohibitive. “But … how? Why?”

She jumped slightly when an open folder was tossed in front of her and Chakotay lowered to one knee at her level.

“Because we take care of family, and Voyager is family,” he told her softly.

Kathryn then looked at the folder in front of her and realized it was ownership paperwork. She slowly glanced to the man she’d fallen in love with the moment they’d met. “What did you do?”

He smiled. “I made a deal.” Chakotay reached to take one of her hands, kissed, and squeezed it between his. “I will provide Starfleet with the technical specs and installation instructions for all of Voyager’s Delta Quadrant technology, but the actual parts stay with her.” He watched as Kathryn’s face registered surprise, disbelief, and relief, in one expression. “I used the majority of the backpay that I got from Starfleet, for the seven years we were gone, plus the money I got on this last job, and,” he smiled, “the crew was more than happy to chip in.”

The senior Admiral cleared his throat.“She won’t be a Starfleet vessel, anymore. As of now, she’s considered a private craft. Her registry number will stay the same, for legality’s sake, and Starfleet is not going to put up any argument over her name staying Voyager. But, she’ll be just Voyager. She won’t have the Starfleet designation USS.”

Paris nodded out the window, toward the ship, “She needs a lot of work to be deep space-worthy again. That refit is on you, as the new owners, but, under the circumstances,” he tapped on the desk, “we will be happy to let you do that here and utilize whatever you need. Manpower, materials, replacement technology.” 

He continued: “You can keep all but the classified Starfleet data on the main computer. That includes the Delta Quadrant info, because, in all honesty, that’s your information.” He stopped for a moment and grinned. “Starfleet will, of course, keep a duplicate copy of all of that information, for our use.”

To be honest, Kathryn was only half-listening to Admiral Paris. She was still trying to digest what had just happened. There was also one other thing that was niggling at her mind. Kathryn turned to Chakotay. “You couldn’t have done this in two days. How long have you been back?”

He pulled one of the chairs over to get off his knee and leaned closer. “About a month. As soon as I got the message from the Admiral, here, about the ship being decommissioned, I contacted him about options.” He nodded to the paperwork, “This was the one I liked the best. We still have a long way to go in paying her off, completely, but,” he grinned, “I got a hell of a bargain.”

Admiral Paris stood. “I’ll leave you two alone, to talk. We can finish going over the specifics, later.” 

Kathryn nodded as Paris left and barely registered that they were now alone. She was still a bit gobsmacked. Kathryn focused on the paperwork; reading, but not reading it. She noticed that she was listed as the co-owner, along with Chakotay. But, of all of that, her mind wouldn’t let go of the fact that he’d been back a month and hadn’t contacted her at all. “I thought you were dead,” she whispered. It had been the catalyst that roared her depression back to the forefront, and the reason her counselor suggested, no - insisted on, the leave of absence.

Chakotay pulled her close. “I’m sorry, Kathryn,” he kissed her temple, “I’m so sorry.” He turned the chair, slightly, so he was between her and the desk. “I was out of communications range until a month ago. Then, I found out about this and wanted to surprise you.” He cupped her face with his hand, tangling his fingers in her hair, and pulled her into a gentle kiss. “I promise, I will never leave you again.”

Kathryn gently rubbed her forehead against his. “I’m going to hold you to that.” She breathed deeply and sat up. Now, feeling more clear-minded, Kathryn picked up the paperwork and truly read it. Of course, he’d listed her as the primary owner. She laughed and held the folder on her lap. “What are we going to do with a ship?”

He smiled broadly. “We’re going to live on it.”

She stood and walked to the window, watching as Voyager floated near the ceiling of the hangar, locked in place with the docking struts. “We’re going to need a crew,” Kathryn said with a smile. “She’s a small ship, but, we can’t properly operate her with just two of us.”

Chakotay walked up behind the woman for whom he’d do anything and wrapped his arms around her. “I have absolutely no idea where we could find a crew.” He laughed lightly as she leaned against him and entwined her hands with his.

Kathryn smiled. “Could be very difficult. We may need to advertise, somewhere.” She turned in his arms to face him. “So, how exactly are we going to make the money to pay the rest of our investment off? Exploration doesn’t exactly pay if we’re not associated with Starfleet.”

Chakotay grinned. “I’ve had some ideas about that, and have spoken to a few people. We can be an independent trading vessel. Not in Starfleet, but working with them, and other companies trading and doing supply runs.” Noting the sarcastic comment written all over her face, he added: “If we do some exploring on the side, then so be it.”

She grinned, and patted his chest. “That sounds like a perfect plan.” Kathryn laughed then and hugged him tightly. “Thank you. You have no idea what this means to me.”

He returned her hug, thankful to have her finally, and fully, in his arms. “Yes, I do.” Chakotay leaned and kissed her hard and passionately. When he broke the kiss, he pulled away and grabbed her hand, then pulled her to the table to grab the papers. “Let’s go tell the crew.”

“But, they already know.” She stopped momentarily and grinned at the spark in his eyes, “You’re no fun, you know.” She laughed as he grabbed her hand, again, and led her quickly out of the office.

“Oh, but I can be!” he said as they moved down the stairs to the walkway.

“I plan to hold you to that!” She laughed as she nearly slipped, but regained her balance. God, but she hadn’t felt this good in years. They slowed as they reached the dais area, where the crew had been waiting at their tables.

Kathryn let go of Chakotay’s hand and walked up the five steps. She grabbed the mic in mock anger and stepped to the front of the small, raised stage. She stood there for a moment, just looking out at them. “You people,” she pointed out at all of them, “all of you.” She lowered the mic for a moment to reign in her emotions. “You have no idea what you mean to me.”

She smiled. “I’m sorry,” Kathryn took a breath, “when we were still in the Delta Quadrant, and I was in my single-minded focus on getting us back to Earth, through the forest, I failed to step back and notice the individual trees. The moments.” Once she started talking, the words just easily tumbled out. “Oh, I knew each and every one of you as members of my crew, and I worried for all of you on any given day, but I never took the time to truly get to know anyone outside of the Senior Staff circles. I apologize for that. You were all forming a family and,  
while I was a part of that family, I feel like I was slightly outside looking in.” Kathryn stubbornly wiped away a stray tear. “I regret that. I was too focused on using my Starfleet training to get us home, that I missed the fact that we could have done it, and did do it, on our own, just fine. I am damned proud of all of us for that!” She smiled as the room erupted in applause and cheers.

Kathryn looked down to Chakotay, still standing at the bottom of the stairs. “And you,” she said to him, but using the mic, “I wasted so much damned time, and you were so … perfect as a first officer and patient. You had to have the patience of a Saint to deal with me and my moods on a daily basis.” She stepped down toward him as he ducked his head and laughed. She reached and caressed his cheek. “Thank you, from me,” she looked over and up, “and Voyager, for saving us both.” She winked. “Multiple times. But, especially, today.” Her smile broadened and the words came easily and without hesitation. “I love you.” Then she remembered she had a microphone in her hand. She smirked and backed away slightly to look aside at their crew. “Eighty percent of you deserved to hear that.” 

She set the mic down and rolled it away, then turned back to the man in her arms. “I should have said that years ago,” she chuckled and gestured to their ‘audience’, “clearly.” 

Chakotay turned to kiss her palm, “Kathryn,” he said in a low voice. “This is really not the place to have this conversation, but, I’ve loved you since the moment you stormed into my life and changed it, irrevocably.” He smiled. “I meant it on New Earth and I mean it now, I’d never known true peace until I met my woman warrior.”

She smiled. “Let’s get out of here.” 

He grinned and glanced upward. “I know the perfect place.”

She chuckled, then realized he was serious. “Environmental and life support controls aren’t on.”

He nodded. “They’ve been on for a couple weeks. She’s my ship, now. That’s where I’ve been staying.”

“Oh, now, see, that’s where you’re wrong,” Kathryn said with determination. ”She’s my ship.”

Chakotay laughed, knowing he would never argue that point. Voyager was definitely Kathryn Janeway’s ship. And he’d made damned sure, she always would be.

### Epilogue

Two weeks later, Admiral Kathryn Janeway walked into Starfleet Command for the last time. She and Chakotay had gone in to finalize some of the issues surrounding the separation of Voyager from Starfleet: what they could and couldn’t keep in her computer data banks; the turn over of the technical details of Voyager’s Delta Quadrant technology; the argument over the Doctor’s program.

The Doctor leaving with them was a little more complicated because of the issue of his sentience. They were currently awaiting a court date to establish just that. Owen Paris had assured Kathryn that it was merely a formality; that he was clearly sentient, and could make up his own mind about where he wanted to go.

Chakotay opened the door that led to the outer offices of the Admiralty of Starfleet and stood aside, so Kathryn could enter first. He walked alongside her to Admiral Paris’ office, and explained to the secretary that they had an appointment, then they sat and waited. He leaned close and quietly asked: “Are you sure you want to do this?”

Kathryn smiled. “I’ve never been more sure of anything in my life.” She threaded her fingers through his and held his hand tightly while they waited. She glanced as the outer door opened and Tom and B’Elanna walked in.

“Sorry we’re late,” Tom said, “we left Miral with Sam and Naomi. I think they mentioned introducing her to Flotter.” He looked at Chakotay, “you got it, right?”

“I’m not likely to forget a marriage license, Tom.”

Tom smirked. “I was talking about my idea for a non-Starfleet communicator badge design for Voyager.”

Kathryn looked up. “Oh, I got that all right, Tom,” she smirked. “What did I say about designs based on Captain Proton?”

Tom looked at Chakotay. “I sent that to you for a reason.”

“Tom,” Kathryn started, but the door to Admiral Paris’ office opened and the older man beckoned them inside.

As the quartet moved into Admiral Paris’ office, he smiled at his son and daughter-in-law. “How’s my granddaughter?”

She’s good, Dad,” Tom replied. “Hanging out with Naomi Wildman and Flotter, I think.”

“Good! Your mother and I would love it if you came to dinner, this evening,” he said to Tom and B’Elanna. “Now,“ he looked at the other couple in the room, “what can I do for you, Admiral Janeway,” he smiled. “As if I didn’t know.” 

Kathryn moved away from Chakotay’s arm, which was around her back, to step closer to the desk. “First, I have some business.” She lay a folder on the desk. “My resignation and Admiral’s bar,” she smiled. “I prefer Captain.”

Owen Paris stepped out from behind his desk and shook her hand. “Starfleet will be a poorer place without you, Kathryn, but I understand your need to do this. We all wish you, Voyager, and her new … old crew, the very best of luck.” 

He lay a caring hand on Kathryn’s shoulder, the other on Chakotay’s shoulder, and smiled. “Now. Let’s get you married.”

fin


End file.
